Drunk Neighbor Boy

A week later, while on my way to my family camping trip, I got a call from work asking if I could bartend. They knew I was on vacation, but the girl that was covering for me ended up in a car accident and would not be able to cover my shift anymore. I reluctantly agreed and said I would be running late as I was already almost to the campsite and would have to drop my brother off at the campground and then take his car to get back to the city.

While still on our way to the campsite, Neighbor Boy messaged me on Facebook. He was following up about the key for the roof. I told him I wasn’t home at the moment, but would be home super late and he could message one of my other roommates for the key to the roof. He flirted for a bit and said that if I hear a bunch of music and noise coming from his apartment when I get home tonight, I should stop by for his birthday party. I told him I would try, but it wouldn’t be until about 3am. He said the party should still be going, but I could also message him to double check whenever I get home. He also tried to tell me he wanted to get my number last week, but didn’t want to ruin my date. I told him that Shane and I are just friends and it wasn’t a date. He didn’t believe me.

I dropped my brother off at the campsite and turned back to go bartend for the evening. My manager thanked me for being there and said that if I wanted, I could leave as early as 12/12:30 as long as it’s not crazy. I took advantage of this offer, closed my POS, and booked it at about 12:20am.

I messaged Neighbor Boy as I was leaving and told him I would be there in about 20 minutes. He didn’t respond. When I got home, as I walked up to my apartment, I heard music coming from Neighbor Boy’s apartment. I wanted to freshen up and grab myself a drink to bring down, so I went up, I stalled in hopes that he would respond before I just showed up.

Fifteen minutes or so went by since I’ve been home, about forty minutes since I messaged him and still no response. In his earlier message, he did say if I heard a bunch of noise and music to stop by. I grabbed my drink, and walked downstairs and walked into the party. As I walked in, there was hardly anyone left. Like less than 10 people. I didn’t see Neighbor Boy in the vast open space, but I also didn’t look for him. I started to say hi to one of Neighbor Boy’s roommates, and not long after I got talking, Neighbor Boy sat up, he was laying on the couch nearly passed out.

He hurried over to talk to me and although I already introduced myself to his roommate Max, Neighbor Boy intervened to introduce us (kind of), but more or less to tell Max that, “This is our sexy upstairs neighbor that I’ve been telling you about,” as he looked me up and down basically staring at my tits.

Kind of offended, also embarrassed, yet some how flattered, I shut him down by saying, “Thanks for the introduction, but I think I got it covered, we already met.” And I continued my conversation with Max. Neighbor Boy drunkenly flustered now, tried to participate in the conversation. I still wasn’t accepting his drunk ass. Max offered to grab me a drink, I finished mine and accepted.

While Max went to the kitchen, Neighbor Boy stepped back in and apologized for his drunkness. He claimed he was napping and trying to sober up before I came, but I got there earlier than he expected. I listened to his drunkness, laughed as he frantically tried to explain to me his approach, and laughed some more as he drunkenly tried to make up for it by telling me things like, “You’re so attractive. Obviously I think you’re attractive. But you’re also cool. You’re sexy….” His drunken statements kept spewing out in a repetitive manner.

I tried to hang out for a bit, when Max came back with my drink, he stood near by to observe the drunken mess in front of us. Neighbor Boy was sloshed, trying to come back, but failing hard. His favorite thing to tell me over and over, “You’re so attractive.” He was trying so hard not to say hot, sexy, or anything that would offend me because he already fucked up. He also brought up my “date” with Shane a few more times, trying to tell me how he didn’t want to ruin it. About twenty minutes of this went by, I finished the drink Max made me, and then said my good byes. Neighbor Boy, upset and confused, followed me to the front door, “Sorry I’m fucked up. You’re so attractive. Can I take you out?” Slurring his words.

Now standing by the front door, I laughed and told him, “Try asking me again when you’re sober.”

“I’m sober enough. I think you’re attractive. Also cool…” he persisted.

“You hardly even know me.” I explained.

“You brought my dog back, so you’re cool.” He was trying so hard. I laughed, he continued, “So can we hang out?”

“You’re drunk. Try another time, and maybe,” I told him.

“Is that maybe a yes? Or are you just being nice?” and before I could tell him to ask me later again, his drunk ass continued, “Do you even find me attractive? I find you attractive.”

“Yes, I find you attractive.”

“Do you really? Or are you just saying that?” He questioned.

“I do.”

“So we can hang out?” He tried again.

“Ask again when you’re sober.” I insisted, and he conceded.

“Fine. But can I get a birthday kiss?” He was pushing it.

“A birthday hug.” I told him.

“A kiss?” He said.

“A kiss on the cheek.” I negotiated.

“Fine.” he accepted.

He hugged me and held me for a moment. He then leaned back still holding me. I looked at him, he pointed to his cheek. I smirked and went to kiss his cheek, he tried to turn his lips towards mine to try to kiss me. I pulled away and gave him a look, he then turned his cheek to me again, and I kissed his cheek. He pulled me in to extend the hug for a moment, then I pulled away and walked out and headed up stairs to pass out.


Is downstairs too close to home? Am I shitting where I eat? When the boy in question lives right downstairs, it’s important to proceed with caution. We’ll see.

Yours Truly,
Kallie Pygus

Failing my Break From Boys

So sorry about being absent. The past week has been crazy busy at work, making art, and just life things. I will finish telling you about Capture the Flag Boy, but will need a little more time before divulging you in all those details.

However, I am officially failing at my break from boys (see I’m Taking a Break from Boys). I was probably always failing. I don’t know if I could ever truly give up, or at least go cold turkey from boys. But I have at least slowed my boy habits a bit.


There are two new developments. This weekend, I met two boys, both musicians. Very dangerous. I curated an exhibition that opened on Friday, there is a venue attached to the gallery so there was also several bands playing that evening. My friends and I were hanging out in the gallery. I saw Boy #1 several feet away. He was tall, skinny, olive skin, dark shaggy hair with some blond accents, dark eyes, and an eclectic fashion sense. We made eye contact, he ruined it by leaning back directly onto a painting. “Dude! Watch out for the painting!” I yelled towards him.

“Fuck! Sorry.” He then walked over and introduced himself. His friend, Brian, joined him. We were all talking, his friend was quiet, but Boy #1, Peter, was funny. We hit it off pretty quick. We only got a few minutes of flirting in because they were being summoned to the stage to perform.

After they played their set, Peter and I made flirty eye contact several times, but we were both preoccupied by everything else. I had gallery people to entertain, he had music people to entertain. At the end of the night, I was talking to two artists about curating them into an exhibition. Peter patiently stood there, and when there was a pause, he interrupted to say good night. It was difficult to pause the conversation for long, so I said bye and he left.

The next day, I got a friend request on Facebook… but it was from Brian, not Peter. I then on a whim decided to add Peter. Several hours later, I got a ping from messenger. I was excited, hoping it was Peter, but no, it was Brian saying that it was great meeting me. I was cordial, but kept the conversation short. I’m still a bit bummed that Peter didn’t message me, but who knows, maybe he still will.

I met Boy #2 on Saturday night. My roommates’ band was performing. I arrived late, but during the band that played right before their set. It was packed. I squeezed my way in and found my friends. As we talked, I saw Boy #2 towards the back of the room. He was the tallest person in the room, dark, slightly athletic build, and quietly hot. He’s the type of hot where he is definitely attractive, but he isn’t over confident or cocky so he is almost more of a mystery. We made eye contact a few times as I spoke with my friends, but there was no way either of us would be able to make our way to one another in that crowd. Once that band ended, my roommates went up to set up and the room cleared a little in between sets. I went to front row center by the stage. My friends and I danced to the soul music playing in the background. Boy #2 made his way up as well, but stayed to the side of the stage.

My roommates started to play and the room flooded with people again. As they played, the dancing changed to a more rock mosh. Not quite dancing, not quite moshing, but definitely movement. Boy #2 leaned against the wall. I was still front center pushing and dancing along. As the set progressed, the pushing got heavier. To get out of it, I made my way to the side, now standing, but still kind of dancing on the side basically right next to Boy #2. Once the band ended, the room cleared pretty fast and I went straight up to my roommates and hugged them as I usually do. Boy #2 stood there for a minute, but I was occupied talking with my roommates. He walked outside to the back patio.

A few minutes later, my friend wanted to smoke, so I went out with her, walking ahead of her. As we got outside, the door shut behind me, I turned, opened the door, and she wasn’t there anymore. Boy #2 was right there though on the patio, and laughed, telling me she ditched me. We then got talking. Chase introduced himself, he told me he was a musician, then told me to like his band’s page on Facebook. I pulled it up, liked it, he then stole my phone and messaged the band through my account. He then messaged me back from his phone. We chatted a little longer, but my roommates were almost packed up and ready to go. We said our good byes and went our separate ways.

That night, we continued to message each other through his band page, then I eventually gave him my number. He invited me to a show his band is playing this Thursday, so of course I said yes. We are texting now as I write this.

Fuck! I definitely failed at giving up boys. But hey, I tried.

Yours Truly,
Kallie Pygus