“Let the Threesome Begin”

I got my period the day after Neighbor Boy and I fucked. Being over a week late, it came with a vengeance and I was miserable for the next few days. On my worst period days, a good orgasm is sometimes necessary to help ease the cramps. I got my vibe out pretty regularly that period. A few days in, Neighbor Boy hit me up asking when we were gonna fuck again and I explained that I was all cramps on on my period.





I tried to message Neighbor Boy later that night, get a quick fuck in. I kind of had a feeling he wasn’t into period sex based off our earlier messages, but thought it was worth a try being that he is super convenient. I messaged him just before midnight asking if he was still awake. His response was that he was with another girl but I should come down with my ropes and give them some pointers, watch, maybe join in.


First of all, I was on my period and he knew that. I was not looking to have a threesome while I was on my period. Second, really? I’m not one to just come and watch. If I wanted to watch people fucking and not be involved, I’d watch porn. Third, I’m not in this convenient fuck buddy thing to coach him and his other sexcapades. Epic fail on his part… but I guess it’s every guy’s dream to be fucking one girl and have another girl magically appear. He treats sex and his sexual desires almost like scenes from a porno, wanting everything to come easy.

INTRODUCTION to Fake Porn as told by me through my perspective on Neighbor Boy:

Boy has girl in bed. They are fucking. Mid fuck, boy gets text from sexy upstairs neighbor girl. The lightbulb goes off in his head, and he tells girl he’s currently fucking, dick still inside her, “I’ve got a great idea, my upstairs neighbor just asked if I’m awake, let’s turn the heat up and make this a threesome.”

Girl bats her eyes and perks her chest as he continues to fuck her, “Oh my god! Yes!”

They roll over, Girl now on top riding Boy so Boy can message upstairs neighbor girl back, “Come down and join me and this other girl I’m already fucking.”

Upstairs girl, “Oh yea, that would be so fucking hot!”

Upstairs girl magically appears knocking at his bedroom door seconds later in nothing but a robe. Neighbor Boy opens the door. He bites his lip, nods, and upstairs girl walks in the room, drops her robe, and goes straight into making out with other girl.

Neighbor Boy looks at both girls as they make out and touch each other’s breasts and says, “Let the threesome begin!”



I’m pretty sure a lot of guys have these fantasies, but I feel like there are better ways to approach them. For me, I’m interested in a threesome, but I feel like I would like to meet all parties outside of the bedroom first, grab a drink or two, then hit the sheets. Maybe that’s just me. But, I also have a feeling I’m not alone in the random invite to join a guy while he’s already fucking someone else.

Is there a right way to start a threesome?

Yours Truly,
Kallie Pygus


Location, location, location

A couple days of messaging after my first sexual encounter with Neighbor Boy, we flirted a bunch and then the convenience has been revealed. It’s as easy as saying “I want to fuck” and within minutes Neighbor Boy could be in my room. As for our first time fucking, he initiated by telling me he wants to fuck me when he gets home. Easy as that…. but because I have a uterus, my period decided to interfere.


He seemed unsure. Like he said period sex was fine, but also hesitant. Then the way he approached telling me that he wanted to fuck and what he wanted to do; at the moment it was a turn off. It also threw me off guard that he was literally negotiating what we were going to do in bed that evening. It was different, and he still does it from time to time, but I’ve learned to enjoy it and it even becomes more like foreplay. A combination of discussing sex to come and sexting.

Lucky for him, my late period didn’t actually start like I thought it did. It was more of pre period spotting that went away shortly after I messaged him that, so he dodged having period sex the first time he fucked me.

The sex was hot. Although he was hesitant because I thought I was getting my period, he still ate me some, played with my vibe, and put in a good amount of effort trying to get me off. I didn’t cum, I rarely cum the first go, but it kept me intrigued and wanting more.

Our boundaries were still a bit blurred. We agreed to have a fuck buddy/friends with benefits situation. I like kissing still, he doesn’t because it’s “too intimate.” Although kissing is too intimate, he likes cuddling? That confuses the fuck out of me. That first night we fucked, he spent the night and cuddled me. It was nice, but weird at the same time.

Every relationship is different. I’ve casually dated and had fuck boys before, some boys like to kiss and cuddle, others don’t. Some like sleep overs, some don’t. I personally like all of the above (sleeping has limits though, snoring and anything that may prevent me from sleeping will send me packing).

This arrangement is unique. I thought having a fuck buddy one floor beneath me would be complicated and messy, I was wrong. It has been very hot and just thinking about the endless possibilities is a huge turn on. It’s easy enough to call him up whenever I want. We even have a convenient oral sex agreement (more on this later). He has his rules, I have mine. We both comply and push boundaries and learn about one another’s sexual desires.

If we want a quickie, there’s no need for dialogue or drinks or hanging out, we can text and within moments we can be fucking, finish, and go on to our separate apartments. If we want a sleep over, it can happen (snoring permitted). And when he does start snoring, I can kick him out if he’s at my place or just up and leave if I’m at his. One flight of stairs, the shortest commute ever. It really has been the most convenient sexual arrangement I’ve had (minus living with my ex boyfriend).

What makes an ideal fuck buddy?  Location, location, location. This was the start of a good arrangement with the downstairs Neighbor Boy and I was very excited for more to come with him.

Yours Truly,
Kallie Pygus